Reflections: Susannah’s First Year at HMI

This summer marked one year since I joined Hendler Mediation Inc. (HMI).

I must acknowledge that I didn’t expect my understanding of the mediation process, or indeed my relationship to it, to change as much as it already has. 

As a trial lawyer, I once perceived mediation as a procedural requirement. Of course I came prepared, but I viewed trial preparation as paramount, and if a case happened to resolve at mediation, then all the better. I often used the mediator to deliver offers and messages, but I wasn’t always interested enough in what the other side had to say about them. I also wasn’t particularly receptive to having my stance challenged by a third party (neutral or not), especially if I questioned their credibility. 

Upon leaving my law practice, I first invested a few years learning as much as I could about the intricacies of negotiation and conflict resolution. That process, combined with observing excellent, sophisticated mediation from the inside has shown me how much more is happening beyond just the exchange of offers. 

I now know that mediation is about the conveyance of information while figuring out what other interests (spoken and unspoken) might be driving the negotiation. It’s highly intuitive and requires you not only to have a firm grasp of the legalities, but also to be switched on enough to pick up on what’s being said between the lines. Just as important, a mediator must have sufficient credibility with each of the parties to ensure that crucial but difficult messages are heard, digested and understood.

Creating favourable conditions for a resolution is both an art and a science.

And I had no idea I’d find the work as meaningful as I do.